Government responds to Stern Review and Eddington

In a shocking move, the Government has called for an end to all new road building and runway expansion.

Responding to the Stern Review and Eddington Report, Secretary of State for Transport Ruth Kelly said "For too long we've been forced to pretend we can have sustainable transport growth - a policy that's lead to more driving, more flying, more emissions."

"Well those days are over. It's time for a radical rethink of aviation expansion. For the sake of the planet, we're hitting the emergency stop button."

Of course she didn't really say any of that - it's business as usual!

Ryanair could face advertising sanctions for "misleading the public"

Ryanair has now been warned it could face advertising sanctions for "misleading the public" and betraying consumer trust as well as bringing "advertising into disrepute."

The boss of the Advertising Standards Agency (ASA) - Christopher Graham - told the Guardian:

"Ryanair has been given every opportunity to work with the ASA and get its advertising right. It faces the real threat of formal sanctions, which includes a referral to the Office of Fair Trading under the Control of Misleading Advertisements Regulations 1988."

Brown: Not so much James Bond as Dr. No

Well that didn't take long, did it? Rather like the moment Timothy Dalton first stepped onto our screens and arched an eyebrow as James Bond, it has taken very little time to realise that Gordon Brown is, quite simply, the wrong man for the job.

As scientists warn us in increasingly desperate terms that we have just 100 months to stabilise emissions of greenhouse gases, we look to Downing Street for a super-hero armed with the latest cutting edge technology to save the world. Instead we are presented with a man who is utterly unconvincing in the role.

France rules out new roads and runways

In typically Gallic style, French President Nicolas Sarkozy declared a "green revolution" yesterday, announcing that there would be no more roads or runways built, alongside the construction of more high-speed rail networks to help shift people out fo the skies and onto the trains.

In a speech which could have come from any number of protest site campfires, Sarkozy called for a "revolution in our way of thinking, in our way of making decisions, a revolution in our way of life".

Will this put a stop to the industry's bleating about how Charles de Gaulle will overtake Heathrow if we don't expand it? Don't hold your breath...

Greenwashing the skies

We're slowly becoming more aware that the forecasted growth rates for aviation threaten all our efforts to stop climate change wiping us off the planet.

While the aviation industry has some insightful arguments in this debate - such as people generally liking flying and wanting to fly more - this "end of the world" effect is a bit of a problem for their marketing departments.

Blair spin doctor joins BAA

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Struggling BAA has hired Blair's former spin doctor Tom Kelly in an effort to halt an ever-growing tide of bad publicity. Kelly is notorious for slandering weapons expert David Kelly, who he called a "Walter Mitty" character just days after his suicide.

BAA is facing a difficult winter - with a Transport Select Committee inquiry into it's future, an assault by the Civil Aviation Authority on its landing fee charges and a Competition Commission investigation into its monopoly on airports in the South-East - and hopes the ex-Downing Street adviser's contacts will help them escape unscathed.

Good to see the revolving door just keeps on spinning...